Australia was never in our plans. I’ve never had any desire to come here, partly because of spiders, partly due to Wolf Creek, plus the conviction that it would be pretty much just the UK with more sun, and I don’t like sun. Our destination after Singapore was supposed to be Indonesia. But though we loved South East Asia, and intend to go back after this intermission, after six months spent cycling there it had started to seem very familiar and not like an adventure. I want to be excited about the road ahead. So we looked at cheap flights and though we at first ignored Australia, it began creeping into our thoughts. It’s so close, and we will never be here with bikes again. It has koalas. Australians like beer. It will be much colder, we can camp again and it will be a completely different adventure.

When we arrived we spent a wonderful few days in Sydney, visiting museums and galleries, enjoying the walks and the breweries. But most importantly, we had great company. An old friend of mine and her husband live here, and we were treated to an amazing guided tour of the city and a couple of evenings of lovely food, beer and wine.

As we explored Sydney we were stopping at every bit of fauna as if we are visiting a zoo. There are White Ibis’ everywhere, which sounds and looks exotic to us, but Australians know them as bin chickens because they scrounge for rubbish and are as common as pigeons in the cities back home.

Richard had heard that water goes down a plughole the opposite way in Australia than in the northern hemisphere, so set out to test this. But in a fairly shit experiment, he didn’t have a non Australian plughole to compare it to. Thankfully there is a tool these days to look this kind of thing up.

We didn’t want to cycle out of the city, and fortunately Sydney is blessed with top notch public transport which includes a ferry system to many of the surrounding areas. But we also wanted to cycle over the Sydney Harbour Bridge, so we did that back and forth before heading for the quay. Although the cycle path over the bridge is on the side away from the Opera House, the views of the city are still spectacular. The ferry to Manly was even better. The angle of the Opera House from the boat is just stunning, and we had a perfect clear bright day to enjoy the journey.

The ferry dropped us at Manly, and the first part of our ride was along a cycle path hugging the glorious beach. The rest of the day was very hilly, but beautiful. We’d booked a campsite for our first night, right along the coast. We took a walk along the beach where there was a surfing competition and a glorious dusk, after which we fell asleep to the sound of the waves.

We had a lung busting couple of days riding north. The inclines were brutal and steep. I have sworn I will never smoke again, and chucked out all smoking paraphernalia. We’ve come to understand that Australia specialises in one of my cycling pet hates: Roundabouts or junctions at the top of hills, especially when turning across the flow of traffic. But it’s one of very few things counting against it.

We tried to stick to the coast as much as possible and stay away from the highway, which meant taking a few small ferries to keep us on track. We got one from the picturesque Palm Beach (where Home & Away is filmed) and the bloke only charged us for one bike. The other side was a lovely quiet coastline of fishing villages and cafes, so we stopped for a coffee and cake. It wasn’t immediately clear how we would get out of the area we were now on; the online map showed a bit of a detour to a proper road. But we trusted to the online bike route planner which promised a path for a few kilometres before we joined the main road, and that would cut out a huge chunk of distance. The bike route started with a paved climb that was impossible to ride up. I don’t think I would have been able to cycle up on a road bike, let alone on our fully laden beasts. So we pushed up. When the route turned off onto a stony mud track, and the GPS had the next section at over a 20% incline we should have known better and just turned back. But sunk cost fallacy got the better of us. We had to get off the trail to let some hikers passed, and they were surprised we were trying to wheel bikes up there. So now we couldn’t go back because of pride. Shortly after that it became impassable for us, with huge boulders, deadfall and parts steeper than what we could manage even pushing the bikes. We went back and forth carrying the bags and the bikes until a couple of hours after we started the trail we were at the top. It was a long day and ended with an uncomfortable sloping camping spot by a busy road.

The trials of the day before were soon forgotten, as the morning started with a bike path through a wildlife reserve. We keep seeing signs to look out for koalas, and we really, REALLY are, but so far no luck.  We had a gorgeous and fitness-affirming climb to the Fernleigh track bike route, which runs beside an historic railway, complete with the old platforms, signs and even a couple of eerie tunnels to bike through. We picked a lovely campsite to take a day off at. As I was setting up in the field for tents the owner drove round and offered to move us to one of the nicer powered sites in the main camp, since there weren’t many other people there. But our spot at the edge of the forest had springy grass, flocks of rainbow lorikeets and the chance of seeing koalas. Getting used to camping again has been tough on my aching limbs, and temperatures in the early morning dropping to 3 degrees does not help and makes getting up very unappealing. With no one else around that evening we decided to test out the hot plate BBQ. Australians love their BBQ to such an extent that these things are everywhere and free to use – public parks, beaches, rest stops, camp sites, as if an Aussie can’t go a day without stopping to grill meat. We destroyed the BBQ. Sausages sticking everywhere, grease burning into the hotplate, and spraying water onto it as we’d been advised just made everything worse. Because no one else was there the lights hadn’t been turned on, so we spent over an hour scrubbing away by torchlight. We’ve been too anxious to use one again. I have tried to observe other people using them to see if we did something wrong, but Richard keeps telling me to stop staring.

Another day, another boat. At first we thought the fee for this one was high, even though it was a nice boat and a longer journey. But then the crew announced that they would be stopping to show us whales and dolphins and anything else that showed up. We stopped for a giant turtle and a shark, and saw a couple of dolphin pods in the distance. Then a group of them were swimming next to and under the boat, closer than I’ve ever been to them, almost close enough to reach out and touch. The crew unloaded our bags and bikes for us, and we continued a perfect day through a National Park riding through tall forest trees and beside a couple of lakes. We took a detour on a track and found a path to a stunning pristine beach, deserted except for us. At the end of the day was a chain/pulley ferry, where the operator gave us a map of the trails nearby and some advice on which one to take. When we set up camp we saw our first kangaroos, casually eating dinner beside us.

The following day we got the same short ferry as the evening before, and the guy wouldn’t charge us.  People have been super friendly here. At least once a day someone will come over when we’re at a rest stop or outside a shop and have a pretty in depth conversation about what we’re doing. People seem genuinely interested in where we’ve been, what we’re doing and what we think of Australia – a question that’s not hard to answer and usually makes them pretty happy.

We took the directions from the ferry guy for a park trail. We intended to take that one anyway so were pleased it lined up with the advice from a local. It was our first experience of really feeling like we’d gone off piste and into the bush. It felt very remote. About an hour in a park ranger passed by us, which gave us some reassurance that someone knew we were there. The track started off as rough gravel and dirt, not something we want to be on every day, but good for a change. Then the washboard surfaces and larger rocks kicked in and things got a bit rough. There were a couple of steep-ish inclines ahead and on the first one my chain got mashed into the front chainrings. We managed to free it so at least I could ride, but I only had three gears to make it the 20km and a couple of hills out of the boonies. None of the gears were climbing ones, so by the end of the day I was knackered from riding in low gears and pushing along when I couldn’t ride. When we reached a campsite there wasn’t enough daylight to look at the bike properly, so we just hunkered down. It was the coldest night so far, and I was now sleeping in my thermals, a couple of t shirts, a coat and a liner inside my sleeping bag.

We had a flat-ish ride to a large town with a bike shop, so we just rolled there the following day. It turned out that my rear gear shifter was broken – not something we could have sorted ourselves. The mechanic squeezed job in that afternoon, but heavy rain was forecast so we took the excuse to find cheap motel for the night.

Richard was overjoyed that I was now amenable to riding on the highway after breaking my bike on the trails, and I was happy to have more than three gears. I have to admit that the next couple of days were the most beautiful yet. It’s hard to believe that anywhere is as amazing as Australia is. The scenery as we dropped into the Manning river valley had me grinning from ear to ear. Apart from one day of rain there hasn’t been a cloud in the sky, which is the colour you’d see in a doctored travel photo or in a brochure, and the stars at night are clearer than I’ve ever seen.

Our next port of call was Port Macquarie, which was a bit Stepford suburbia with its insanely manicured lawns and immaculate homes. But we were here for a wildlife sanctuary and an appointment with koalas. We got to have a pat or cuddle with about eight koalas, and syringe feed another. They are marsupials and not actually related to bears, but they are soft and cuddly like teddies and it was difficult not to sneak one or two into some panniers.

We’re making really slow progress up the coast, partly because we’ve been taking backroads and trails which are rough going at times, and partly because our days are truncated by camping: The cold mornings mean we’re getting late starts, and it gets very suddenly dark at about 5 o’clock so we stop a couple of hours before that to set up camp, do our cooking and clearing up while it’s still light. But also because we have been enjoying this place so much and we want to take our time here and take it all in. Normally we’re getting itchy feet when we’re not making much progress, but in Australia I’m just looking forward to all the time we spend here.

A playlist for the ride: